Being direct is not always a bad thing! I’m not just saying this to defend myself.
In fact, at least in my mind, being indirect just makes things worse. It’s like a relationship that just lingers on way too long– one person is totally into it and the other is not. Or like an employee that clearly isn’t working out but keeps his job because the boss doesn’t have the heart to fire him. In these situations, the outcome is never good. It just wastes peoples’ time.
However, I would recommend the following don’ts:
- Be rude or insensitive with your directness.
- Give your unsolicited opinion. This is a big one people need to learn, including myself.
- Battle everything and anything.
- Excuse knee jerk reactions.
We also need to understand, that even when we follow all of the above, there will be those who will still take offense. They will think you demanding, brusque, threatening and even intimidating. But don’t let that deter you. Make the ask. Defend your position. Also adjust your approach.
For some, being direct comes easy. It easily slips out like saying yes to piece of chocolate cake. Others have built their directness by building their confidence in what they know and do.
However, there are many that it doesn’t come easy. They believe being direct is impolite, so they avoid the hard conversations.
No matter what, just remember this… HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY.