Difference Maker!
This is not my story, but it did have an impact on me.
My best friend, or as we like to call each other sisters from another mother, had been married since she was nineteen or twenty years old. When we met, I was probably about twenty-eight. She was already married for over a decade with two gorgeous, intelligent, and kind children.
Her and I started working for a commercial real estate company on the same day. Her cube was just on the other side of mine in an office we shared. We could not be more different from each other. She is that personable likeable human. The first things out of her mouth to everyone she sees, is “how are you? You look beautiful today!” or “is there anything you need?” She brings such a radiant light to whatever room she walks in. Her love runs deep.
Me, not so much. I will walk by everyone with just a hello so I am not rude. I just jump right into what needs to be accomplished in every conversation I start. This is something I’m working on and have made some improvements. Taking down my armor is not my strong suite.
But this woman has made me softer. I hug more often and say I love you all the time to any one because of her. These are things that I always felt but never was confident enough express out loud. I still am all about work before personal, but now thanks to her I can get to the personal. I know and crave the personal now. See… improvements!
Anyway, after some years my friend and her husband took a break. I was in shock. I always looked at their relationship as this perfect marriage, perfect family. Something I emulated to have of my own. I couldn’t believe it.
All I wanted was to be there for her as much as she had always been there for me. I’ll never forget the conversation up in her room, crying together, drinking wine. She was telling me all the things she started doing on her own, things that he normally did. From mowing the lawn to unclogging the shower drain from her and her daughter’s hair, she discovered she could be on her own. We were celebrating!
Then she said that the hardest part was he was still the first person she wanted to call to talk about her day. He was the only person she wanted to hold. Even with all the hurt and pain caused; he was the one. I looked her in that moment, and said “You don’t need him, you want him.” There is something so tragically beautiful in this fact.
Many of us don’t realize this about the people in our lives until it’s too late.
They are of course back together, stronger than ever. I learned though that relationships in life are not easy. Even the strongest ones have their trials and tribulations. Some we let go when they begin to fade. Then there are others that when they fade, we realize how significant they are to us and never let go. Those tend to be the best ones because we get it.